x x x

 

 and in the dark of night we will plant a stake
in concrete rubble and ashes
proclaiming FEAR HAS NO PLACE HERE.

stating our name as I HAVE MADE IT THIS FAR

and I WILL GO ON

because this dark, it's not going to take us over.
we are going to wield the shadows
and turn lungs-searching-for-air, confused minds,
into battle cries
of HOPE 
    and LIFE.

this night isn't the end, friend.
this is the starting line.

we won't give up on hope, on life

it's so easy to let the weight on our shoulders weigh down our hope,
to let the shadows blow out the lights in our eyes;
it's faster to fade into dark hollow islands
than to stay out in the sunshine
where the air is warm, breeze - gentle, cool -
and hands held up high together;
staying together is hard, filling lungs with air, even harder,
but i want you to know a little secret -
we're not going to give up on hope.
we won't allow that to happen -
ever;
hope will win this battle.
we just have to remain conscious to celebrate with eyes wide open
and hearts deep screaming joy.
stay with us. stay with me.
don't give up this fight.

anxious / dramatic / direction

i'm not trying to be dramatic

my brain is just filled with static

a constant buzz, hum drum

it can make it hard to

rest; some

times i think the thoughts are

slowing, turns out they're just

pausing

for dramatic effect

but i think i'm getting to a place,

where

thoughts are a little more

still, a

little more quiet

or maybe i'm learning to just

tune it all

out

now. either way, i know the quiet of the

night will

come, again, and thoughts will be just

as chaotic as the beginning of the world,

again, as numerous as the stars,

again, and, somehow i'll make it out,

 again.

i'm not trying to be dramatic

 my mind's just an addict

leaving me with all or nothing

and no direction as to where i am

going

it's hard not to use hyperbole when stuck in a

whirlpool

( or is it all exactly as it seems? )

you'll see me tomorrow because / nspw 2015

          

you'll see me tomorrow because of all of the sunrises and sunsets i have yet to see. because of emily and eqiii and jacob and cole and kayla and jake and mom and dad and veronica and mike and alex and all the people i love, the people that care about me. because of all the kids i need to love on, inspire, care for, and teach; because of all of the good books, good movies, good music i have yet to discover; because concerts and worship and plays and musicals and pizza and kittens and donuts and ice cream cake and birthdays (all the birthdays); because wearing cute dresses just for fun, because dresses with pockets; because sunflowers and dark chocolate and teddy bears and pillow pets and freshly washed sheets and towels straight from the drier and oversized sweaters and hot showers and new notebooks and silly stickers and red lipstick and handwritten letters and laughing so hard tears stream down your face and fireworks on the fourth of july and jumping into the deep end and searching for seashells by the seashore and pens that do your handwritting some justice and campfires and s'mores with your favorites and thanksgiving dinner and warm, safe hugs and finding your home. because there's a whole damn big world out there that i haven't laid eyes on yet i haven't touched yet i haven't smelled yet i haven't heard yet, and there are 7 billion people i need to say 'hi' to give hugs to smile at; because of all the stupid silly gifts i need to give my friends that turn into inside jokes that last a lifetime; because i have so much love left to give; because there is an infinite spring inside me full of sunshine and love and hope that needs some help breaking free; because even though just the thought of getting out of bed every morning hurts like hell, God has a purpose and a plan, so much bigger and brighter than my pain, that hasn't even started yet; a plan made of healing and hope and growth and love and life. and all that's just scratching the surface of why you'll see me tomorrow.


This week is National Suicide Prevention Week, and today is World Suicide Prevention Day.
For more info on NSPW, visit here. 
For more info on We’ll See You Tomorrow, TWLOHA’s annual NSPW/WSPD awareness campaign, visit here.